It was Lydia Netzer's
idea, but I had to give it a try: boycott the exclamation point for an entire
week.
Back in high school, my
12th grade English teacher stressed that writing should be accurate and
correctly punctuated. She made a big deal out of overuse and by the time
students left vonz's classroom, they knew how to write and punctuate
effectively.
In the twenty-four years
(shudder) since graduating from JMHS, I've let myself slide. What did seven
days without exclamation points teach me?
First, I use exclamation
points too much. Most of what I typed that week was perfectly fine punctuated
by the humble period.
Second, interjections
have their place. Sometimes you're excited and you need to shout.
Third, I'm proud to say I
even managed to keep my creative prose free of exclamation points during my
experiment. There were a few times (usually when writing dialogue) that I was a
little worried, but once I thought about it for a few seconds, I found
effective choices that I actually liked better than my original instincts.
The biggest lesson for me
was that email and social media like Facebook make overusing the exclamation
point frightfully easy.
When the goal is to keep
up with as many people as possible as regularly as possible, quality suffers.
When we're celebrating or commiserating, we want the force of our emotions to
come through so we tend to respond using short phrases and exclamation points. We're attempting to replace our body
language and facial expressions, but there is no replacement.
Although I started out
giving up exclamation points for one week, it wasn't like all those times I
gave up chocolate for Lent; I didn't return to littering my text with
exclamations the minute my week was up. Not everything my friends say requires
an exclamatory response. Sometimes? Yes. Some people might think I'm being
stingy with my emotions by withholding exclamation points, and perhaps I am.
However, I choose to think that when everything is exciting, after a while nothing is.
PS: I deliberately used one exclamation point during my week-long hiatus: to
express my excitement when Penelope's soccer team won the first game in their
fall classic tournament. I stand by that choice because if I'd been there for
the game I would have been cheering.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Three strong, awesome women
Pen & Em opted to give Arwen a suitcase since she starts the journey to the Grey Havens. Galadriel got a golden chalice to use when pouring water into her mirror. Eowyn got an axe to use on the Pelennor fields. The girls plan to reallocate parts of the Rohan soldier that came with the play set we bought (#9471 Uruk-hai Army) and give them to Eowyn, because every warrior needs a good helmet.
What does a girl have to do
to be made into a LEGO mini-fig?
I assumed that the whole hullabaloo over LEGO Friends this past winter would have spurred someone to think carefully before releasing the Lord of the Rings play sets. Apparently I have too much faith in people's intelligence.
I get that some girls like the curvy pink characters, as well as the tiny hairdryers and magazines that come with these play sets. My daughter Emma even bought two of the smaller Friends sets with her allowance money. They've got some neat parts. She's not thrilled that the figures' legs don't move independently, but surmises that's because the legs are so spindly, they'd break too easily. Hmm. Is that a purposeful message? Don't tax yourselves, girls; you might break.
I don't see a problem with marketing girly-girl sets to those who like them. Emma is crazy about her Littlest Pet Shop sets and her collection of Squinkies. Both my daughters used their own money to purchase a bunch of those motorized hamsters, but they didn't just buy the pink sparkly hamsters. No, my daughters bought a bunch of the green, grey, blue & black Kung Fu hamsters, as well. They bought battle armor to go on all the hamsters, even the sparkly ones. I think the pinkest, sparkliest hamster is in fact the supreme villain of Hamsterville. They've also shelled out their own money for several LEGO Ninjago sets and a few Alien Conquest sets. (Last I heard, the aliens were preparing to attack the Heartlake City beauty shop and demand free seaweed wraps.) Between gifts and their own money, Pen and Em garnered the entire Harry Potter collection this past winter. So when the new LEGO catalog arrived and my girls saw Frodo and the ring on the front, they couldn't find the Sharpies fast enough. A few minutes later?
"Hey! Where's Arwen?"
Then, "what? There's no Galadriel?"
Finally, "no Eowyn? You've gotta be kidding me!"
They slide the first page of the LOTR spread in front of me and jab at the characters. Emma starts tallying everything up. "Look! There's Eomer! There are Mordor orcs and Moria orcs."
"They made the cave troll," Penelope interrupts.
"There's five different Uruk-hai. They made two Ringwraiths, but left out Eowyn! I mean, don't they even know that she KILLS the WITCH KING!?"
At this point, Penelope shouts, "I am no man! Yahhhhhhhh!" and drives an imaginary sword into an imaginary Witch King's head.
Okay, maybe I'm remembering that wrong. Maybe that was me.
Hang on, I tell them. Let's not panic. Maybe they're only releasing sets for the first movie right now. That's got to be it, right? I mean, I don't see Minas Tirith, Isengard, or the Black Gate. But neither do I see an elven kingdom or an Amon Hen set.
However, there are sets for Helm's Deep (Two Towers) and Shelob (Return of the King). Plus, Arwen and Galadriel were onscreen in Fellowship, and could technically be included in the Weathertop and Moria sets.
I flip through the catalog and see Ann Lee and a vampyre bride. I note that Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy and Black Widow are included in the appropriate sets, but simply can't count the Wonder Woman keychain as an action figure. The Kingdom and Town sets each include a few women. Finally, in the Star Wars spread, I find two Princess Leia figures but no Queen Amidala.
I understand that these sets were built predominately with boys in mind. At nine, my daughters are already jaded enough to know that female figures will be few and far between, but really, LEGO? No Eowyn?
I can imagine the strategy sessions.
I mean, what did the women in the story do, really? Assuming we're only working off the movies, let's take inventory.
We can ignore Arwen because she was pretty useless, right? She only outran a posse of nine ringwraiths to get Frodo into elf territory. She only convinced her father to reforge the shards of Narsil, then trek all the way out to Dunharrow and present Anduril to Aragorn. A minor character. Aragorn might have gotten Frodo to safety without her and Elrond might have thought of reforging the sword on his own. Plus, she disobeyed her father and almost died because she was in love with a guy who had a great job waiting for him, but was more content to roam around and play tortured soul. So, okay. Leave out Arwen.
Galadriel didn't do very much, either. True, she gave the Fellowship shelter after they escaped Moria. She did that cool telepathy thing and gave Frodo some guidance. She sent the Fellowship on their way with all those nifty little gifts that came in handy later. Remember the elvish rope that helped Sam and Frodo get down the cliff? And the Phial that Frodo and Sam used to fight Shelob? What about those amazing cloaks that hid them from the soldiers outside the Black Gate? Nah. I'm sure everything would have worked out just smashingly without all that stuff. Plus, all the telepathy did was freak everyone out, and it's not as if Frodo didn't already know that the ring was overcoming Boromir. And when Frodo offers her the ring and she had to fight its power? Seriously, how did that not wake up the entire city? That was totally unrealistic. We can skip Galadriel.
Eowyn is a tough one. She did kill the Witch King, after all. But do we really want to hold her up as an example to impressionable young girls? I mean, Eowyn balks at every order she's given. She doesn't want to lead the women and children to safety when the Warg riders attack. She doesn't want to stay in the caves with them during the battle of Helm's Deep. She obeys both orders, but you can tell she's only doing it because she doesn't see a way out. Then, she follows the Rohirrim to Dunharrow. (It's tradition for the women of the court to see the men off to battle. Shyeah. Like anybody fell for that.) She actually hides her hair in a helmet and tags along to Minas Tirith. Can you believe the gall? Do we really want to teach girls to be so headstrong? She gets away with it, too! Aragorn heals her and then she gets all lovey-dovey with Faramir. We can't have boys thinking it's okay for girls to behave this way, all brave and independent. We certainly can't have girls thinking that if they hold true to themselves and follow their heart, they'll be happy and maybe even find someone they love. No, we need to keep our girls pining away for the ones they can't have, like Aragorn, and then promise them to creeps like Grima. If Eowyn had spent more time learning her feminine duties, she would have been a better cook, too. Did you see the stew she served on the road to Helm's Deep? And she expected the men to fight after eating it? (Rohan calls Time-Out! We need to use the privvy. Why don't you tell your orcs to take a break, Lurtz? We may be awhile...) No, no, no. We need to nip this in the bud. Eowyn's out.
I see.
Some people might boycott LEGO because they left these three women -- awesome, strong, kick-ass women -- out of their Lord of the Rings play sets. Me and my daughters? We're headed to the LEGO store to build our own Eowyn, Galadriel, and Arwen.
Take that, LEGO!
I assumed that the whole hullabaloo over LEGO Friends this past winter would have spurred someone to think carefully before releasing the Lord of the Rings play sets. Apparently I have too much faith in people's intelligence.
I get that some girls like the curvy pink characters, as well as the tiny hairdryers and magazines that come with these play sets. My daughter Emma even bought two of the smaller Friends sets with her allowance money. They've got some neat parts. She's not thrilled that the figures' legs don't move independently, but surmises that's because the legs are so spindly, they'd break too easily. Hmm. Is that a purposeful message? Don't tax yourselves, girls; you might break.
I don't see a problem with marketing girly-girl sets to those who like them. Emma is crazy about her Littlest Pet Shop sets and her collection of Squinkies. Both my daughters used their own money to purchase a bunch of those motorized hamsters, but they didn't just buy the pink sparkly hamsters. No, my daughters bought a bunch of the green, grey, blue & black Kung Fu hamsters, as well. They bought battle armor to go on all the hamsters, even the sparkly ones. I think the pinkest, sparkliest hamster is in fact the supreme villain of Hamsterville. They've also shelled out their own money for several LEGO Ninjago sets and a few Alien Conquest sets. (Last I heard, the aliens were preparing to attack the Heartlake City beauty shop and demand free seaweed wraps.) Between gifts and their own money, Pen and Em garnered the entire Harry Potter collection this past winter. So when the new LEGO catalog arrived and my girls saw Frodo and the ring on the front, they couldn't find the Sharpies fast enough. A few minutes later?
"Hey! Where's Arwen?"
Then, "what? There's no Galadriel?"
Finally, "no Eowyn? You've gotta be kidding me!"
They slide the first page of the LOTR spread in front of me and jab at the characters. Emma starts tallying everything up. "Look! There's Eomer! There are Mordor orcs and Moria orcs."
"They made the cave troll," Penelope interrupts.
"There's five different Uruk-hai. They made two Ringwraiths, but left out Eowyn! I mean, don't they even know that she KILLS the WITCH KING!?"
At this point, Penelope shouts, "I am no man! Yahhhhhhhh!" and drives an imaginary sword into an imaginary Witch King's head.
Okay, maybe I'm remembering that wrong. Maybe that was me.
Hang on, I tell them. Let's not panic. Maybe they're only releasing sets for the first movie right now. That's got to be it, right? I mean, I don't see Minas Tirith, Isengard, or the Black Gate. But neither do I see an elven kingdom or an Amon Hen set.
However, there are sets for Helm's Deep (Two Towers) and Shelob (Return of the King). Plus, Arwen and Galadriel were onscreen in Fellowship, and could technically be included in the Weathertop and Moria sets.
I flip through the catalog and see Ann Lee and a vampyre bride. I note that Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy and Black Widow are included in the appropriate sets, but simply can't count the Wonder Woman keychain as an action figure. The Kingdom and Town sets each include a few women. Finally, in the Star Wars spread, I find two Princess Leia figures but no Queen Amidala.
I understand that these sets were built predominately with boys in mind. At nine, my daughters are already jaded enough to know that female figures will be few and far between, but really, LEGO? No Eowyn?
I can imagine the strategy sessions.
I mean, what did the women in the story do, really? Assuming we're only working off the movies, let's take inventory.
We can ignore Arwen because she was pretty useless, right? She only outran a posse of nine ringwraiths to get Frodo into elf territory. She only convinced her father to reforge the shards of Narsil, then trek all the way out to Dunharrow and present Anduril to Aragorn. A minor character. Aragorn might have gotten Frodo to safety without her and Elrond might have thought of reforging the sword on his own. Plus, she disobeyed her father and almost died because she was in love with a guy who had a great job waiting for him, but was more content to roam around and play tortured soul. So, okay. Leave out Arwen.
Galadriel didn't do very much, either. True, she gave the Fellowship shelter after they escaped Moria. She did that cool telepathy thing and gave Frodo some guidance. She sent the Fellowship on their way with all those nifty little gifts that came in handy later. Remember the elvish rope that helped Sam and Frodo get down the cliff? And the Phial that Frodo and Sam used to fight Shelob? What about those amazing cloaks that hid them from the soldiers outside the Black Gate? Nah. I'm sure everything would have worked out just smashingly without all that stuff. Plus, all the telepathy did was freak everyone out, and it's not as if Frodo didn't already know that the ring was overcoming Boromir. And when Frodo offers her the ring and she had to fight its power? Seriously, how did that not wake up the entire city? That was totally unrealistic. We can skip Galadriel.
Eowyn is a tough one. She did kill the Witch King, after all. But do we really want to hold her up as an example to impressionable young girls? I mean, Eowyn balks at every order she's given. She doesn't want to lead the women and children to safety when the Warg riders attack. She doesn't want to stay in the caves with them during the battle of Helm's Deep. She obeys both orders, but you can tell she's only doing it because she doesn't see a way out. Then, she follows the Rohirrim to Dunharrow. (It's tradition for the women of the court to see the men off to battle. Shyeah. Like anybody fell for that.) She actually hides her hair in a helmet and tags along to Minas Tirith. Can you believe the gall? Do we really want to teach girls to be so headstrong? She gets away with it, too! Aragorn heals her and then she gets all lovey-dovey with Faramir. We can't have boys thinking it's okay for girls to behave this way, all brave and independent. We certainly can't have girls thinking that if they hold true to themselves and follow their heart, they'll be happy and maybe even find someone they love. No, we need to keep our girls pining away for the ones they can't have, like Aragorn, and then promise them to creeps like Grima. If Eowyn had spent more time learning her feminine duties, she would have been a better cook, too. Did you see the stew she served on the road to Helm's Deep? And she expected the men to fight after eating it? (Rohan calls Time-Out! We need to use the privvy. Why don't you tell your orcs to take a break, Lurtz? We may be awhile...) No, no, no. We need to nip this in the bud. Eowyn's out.
I see.
Some people might boycott LEGO because they left these three women -- awesome, strong, kick-ass women -- out of their Lord of the Rings play sets. Me and my daughters? We're headed to the LEGO store to build our own Eowyn, Galadriel, and Arwen.
Take that, LEGO!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
I smell the rose in her hair
Just because SOPA is off the agenda in the House doesn't mean it's off the radar, and PIPA is still in committee in the Senate. These bills are about greed in the entertainment industry. There may be entertaining things on the internet, but the internet itself is so much more than entertainment.
Friday, November 11, 2011
because you can't, you won't, and you don't stop
I know, this post is long overdue. Most of you already know, but Emma is okay. Penelope, Dan and I just hung on for the ride, because what else can you do, really?
We waved goodbye to her as she was wheeled off to surgery, and then we waited. Too tired to knit, I tried to read a little. We were fine, really; just waiting, waiting, waiting. It wasn't until Dr. Z, the cardiologist, came out to talk to us, insistent that we find a room, that we got nervous.
During the surgery, while Dr. W was scooping out enough surrounding tissue to ensure that the membrane would not grow back, he created a small hole between the aorta and the left ventricle. He stitched it up but the stitching didn't hold when they restarted Emma's heart; the hole reopened. Dr. W put her back on bypass was patching the hole with Teflon as we spoke. The thing that Dr. Z was actually concerned about, though, was Emma's rhythm -- her heart was beating too slowly, and Dr. Z was worried that the heart's electrical system had been damaged by the surgery (this is called "heart block"). There was nothing to do for this but wait and see, while keeping her hooked up to an external pacemaker
They gave it about seven days before they concluded that her heart was not returning to a normal rhythm, so now Emma has an internal pacemaker.
That's the quick version. The long one?
After Dr. Z left us, I emailed, then called my mom (she and my dad were here to take care of Penelope while Emma was in Boston). She answered the phone and I said, "How scared do we need to be?" My mom, my wonderful mom, Nurse Grandma, told me "Honestly, not very," and Dan and I both started breathing again. We filtered everything through her; she translated it for us, then we told Dan's parents and put it up on Facebook.
That first night, I stayed in the parent room down the hall, and checked in on her a few times; knowing they would come and get me if something was wrong didn't make it any easier to sleep; I wanted desperately to be with her, but there's just not room enough for the patient, the parent, and the respirator. Necessarily, it's the parent that gets kicked out. She was hooked up to the external pacemaker, so she had several wires just sticking out of her chest and belly in unexpected places; an IV line in her right hand, as well as one in her neck, both of which were in use; two chest tubes in her belly to drain fluid from her chest cavity; the catheter (everyone's favorite!); the pulse-ox monitor; and the nasal tube. Even though she was doped up, she wanted to sit up. Dr. D, the anesthesiologist, was amazed (pleased, really) at how many times she tried to sit up on her own, even on the morphine. (That's not to say that the doctors and nurses were pleased, but to Dr. D it was confirmation that Emma had tolerated the anesthesia well.)
The next morning (June 16), Emma was extubated about two hours ahead of schedule (another good thing); the gastric tube was removed early that afternoon, and she began with Jello and Popsicles, in spite of the fact that what she really wanted was potato chips. She also watched a video message from Penelope and recorded a short response.
That night, the nurse and I had to change Emma's dressings several times; one of the leads to the external pacemaker was acting as an extra chest tube. Although this was ultimately okay (better out than in!), the dressings were completely soaked every 60 minutes or so.
I got almost no sleep; each dressing change took about an hour, because Emma had to be cleaned up and the bedding and hospital johnny had to be changed in addition to the dressing. The whole time, Emma was incredibly patient, but by the time each change was done, Emma and I were both wide awake and it took quite a while for us to settle back down and fall asleep. By the time we were asleep, it was nearly time for the dressing to be changed again. As it was, the nurse let it go a little longer than she would have during the day, but it was still grueling.
The next morning, they took her off the morphine (which made her very nauseated) and started her on Toradol with Tylenol as needed; her appetite picked up and she had some real food (chicken salad) for dinner. We also got the okay (from the PICU's head nurse) for Penelope to visit the following day. Seeing her sister was an enormous boon to Emma's spirits! Before I arrived with Penelope and my parents, Emma was de-lined: the catheter and arterial lines were removed, as were both chest tubes. The seepage around the one pacemaker lead was slowing down a bit.
Penelope visited again on Father's Day. A nurse caught sight of Emma's smile as Pen entered the room and declared Penelope "the only one who can make Emma smile!"
Later in the day, Emma had a visit with A, a social worker from the ChildLife program; A and her coworker, L, would keep us informed about how Emma is handling everything emotionally. So far, she is right where they would expect her to be.
The doctors have decided that she's definitely getting a pacemaker; at this point, it's a matter of getting on the OR schedule. From this point, I'll let my Facebook posts take over.
June 19, 8:50 pm: There's my Emma's infectious giggle! Thank you, Disney Channel's So Random!
June 20, 7:43 pm: Emma's pacemaker will go in on Tuesday . . . no, Wednesday . . . no, Tuesday. Okay, Tuesday afternoon officially.
June 21, 2:36 pm: . . . and we're baaaaaaaaaack! To Wednesday! We're perfectly willing to be bumped, however. Heart-transplant trumps still-kinda-working-heart. Emma was just relieved to be able to eat.
June 22, 9:31 am: Dr W's just been sent home to sleep. Emma had a bowl of Cheerios at 6:30 and is now on No Food or Water. She'll go in for her pacemaker this afternoon.
June 22, 9:42 am: The echo team is in, now. Still haven't had rounds come our way yet today. Gnomeo and Juliet is on . . . again!!! ;-) Aunt Reeb wonders (via comment field) if Emma has memorized it, yet, and Emma responds "Basically, almost the whole thing!"
June 22, 10:06 am: Rounds have been by, now; surgery will likely start between 12 and 2 this afternoon.
June 22, 2:12 pm: Bumped AGAIN! It's Transplant Week! Tufts has a kidney transplant inserting itself into the midst of the logjam created by yesterday's (okay, last night's!) heart transplant. The PA says Emma will definitely go tomorrow; they don't want her wait another day.
June 22, 4:26 pm: Dr W. is hoping to get her in as first case on Thursday. He spent half the afternoon skulking around, trying to snag an OR today to no avail.
June 22, 7:30 pm: We're officially on the schedule for 7:30 am Thursday! NPO (Again!) from midnight, tonight. Third time lucky?
June 23, 8:01 am: Dan called at 7:40 & Emma is in surgery!
June 23, 12:03 pm: Emma ROCKS!!! She was out & awake by 10:30. She's currently back in the PICU, resting and watching her dance recital DVD.
June 23, 2:02 pm: Emma has had some strawberries & some applesauce, & is currently FaceTiming w/ Penelope. Earlier, Dr. D was in & laughed at the fact that Emma was already sitting up & playing games on Webkinz.
June 23, 6:14 pm: According to Nurse K, Emma is amazing. Nurse K says she's going to tell all her cardiac patients now to "Be strong; be an Emma!"
June 24, 12:14 pm: When I got off the elevator this morning, Emma and Dan were in the hallway, waiting for me! The girl kicking butt and taking names? That's my daughter!!
June 24, 6:06 pm: Took a walk all the way down to the 1st floor gift shop with Emma & bought a few small things. Then we wandered over to Au Bon Pain & she ordered a tuna salad sandwich, chips, lemonade, & a chocolate chip cookie for dinner.
June 25, 11:48 am: Thank you, thank you, thank you, everyone who kept Emma and our whole family in their thoughts this past 10 days! Emma is home, the beagle has calmed down, and my twins are being normal, 8-year-old twins once again!
Yes, she has a medic-alert bracelet, now. The pacemaker is for life, and she's not allowed to do backbends or the Worm. Certain amusement-park rides are verboten, blows to the belly are cause for concern, and she will forever be the Pat-Down Princess in airports. I'm trying to help her find a response that she's comfortable using when strangers ask her about her scar (which is visible when she wears a v-neck shirt or a swimsuit). But she's been on her bike again since the beginning of August, and she's back in ballet/tap/jazz and Hip-Hop. She's thrown herself back into roller skating Fridays with gusto. We even had a Harry Potter Film Festival in July, because the girls wanted to see the movie in the theater with us! People who don't know what happened would never be able to guess.
We waved goodbye to her as she was wheeled off to surgery, and then we waited. Too tired to knit, I tried to read a little. We were fine, really; just waiting, waiting, waiting. It wasn't until Dr. Z, the cardiologist, came out to talk to us, insistent that we find a room, that we got nervous.
During the surgery, while Dr. W was scooping out enough surrounding tissue to ensure that the membrane would not grow back, he created a small hole between the aorta and the left ventricle. He stitched it up but the stitching didn't hold when they restarted Emma's heart; the hole reopened. Dr. W put her back on bypass was patching the hole with Teflon as we spoke. The thing that Dr. Z was actually concerned about, though, was Emma's rhythm -- her heart was beating too slowly, and Dr. Z was worried that the heart's electrical system had been damaged by the surgery (this is called "heart block"). There was nothing to do for this but wait and see, while keeping her hooked up to an external pacemaker
They gave it about seven days before they concluded that her heart was not returning to a normal rhythm, so now Emma has an internal pacemaker.
That's the quick version. The long one?
After Dr. Z left us, I emailed, then called my mom (she and my dad were here to take care of Penelope while Emma was in Boston). She answered the phone and I said, "How scared do we need to be?" My mom, my wonderful mom, Nurse Grandma, told me "Honestly, not very," and Dan and I both started breathing again. We filtered everything through her; she translated it for us, then we told Dan's parents and put it up on Facebook.
That first night, I stayed in the parent room down the hall, and checked in on her a few times; knowing they would come and get me if something was wrong didn't make it any easier to sleep; I wanted desperately to be with her, but there's just not room enough for the patient, the parent, and the respirator. Necessarily, it's the parent that gets kicked out. She was hooked up to the external pacemaker, so she had several wires just sticking out of her chest and belly in unexpected places; an IV line in her right hand, as well as one in her neck, both of which were in use; two chest tubes in her belly to drain fluid from her chest cavity; the catheter (everyone's favorite!); the pulse-ox monitor; and the nasal tube. Even though she was doped up, she wanted to sit up. Dr. D, the anesthesiologist, was amazed (pleased, really) at how many times she tried to sit up on her own, even on the morphine. (That's not to say that the doctors and nurses were pleased, but to Dr. D it was confirmation that Emma had tolerated the anesthesia well.)
The next morning (June 16), Emma was extubated about two hours ahead of schedule (another good thing); the gastric tube was removed early that afternoon, and she began with Jello and Popsicles, in spite of the fact that what she really wanted was potato chips. She also watched a video message from Penelope and recorded a short response.
That night, the nurse and I had to change Emma's dressings several times; one of the leads to the external pacemaker was acting as an extra chest tube. Although this was ultimately okay (better out than in!), the dressings were completely soaked every 60 minutes or so.
I got almost no sleep; each dressing change took about an hour, because Emma had to be cleaned up and the bedding and hospital johnny had to be changed in addition to the dressing. The whole time, Emma was incredibly patient, but by the time each change was done, Emma and I were both wide awake and it took quite a while for us to settle back down and fall asleep. By the time we were asleep, it was nearly time for the dressing to be changed again. As it was, the nurse let it go a little longer than she would have during the day, but it was still grueling.
The next morning, they took her off the morphine (which made her very nauseated) and started her on Toradol with Tylenol as needed; her appetite picked up and she had some real food (chicken salad) for dinner. We also got the okay (from the PICU's head nurse) for Penelope to visit the following day. Seeing her sister was an enormous boon to Emma's spirits! Before I arrived with Penelope and my parents, Emma was de-lined: the catheter and arterial lines were removed, as were both chest tubes. The seepage around the one pacemaker lead was slowing down a bit.
Penelope visited again on Father's Day. A nurse caught sight of Emma's smile as Pen entered the room and declared Penelope "the only one who can make Emma smile!"
Later in the day, Emma had a visit with A, a social worker from the ChildLife program; A and her coworker, L, would keep us informed about how Emma is handling everything emotionally. So far, she is right where they would expect her to be.
The doctors have decided that she's definitely getting a pacemaker; at this point, it's a matter of getting on the OR schedule. From this point, I'll let my Facebook posts take over.
June 19, 8:50 pm: There's my Emma's infectious giggle! Thank you, Disney Channel's So Random!
June 20, 7:43 pm: Emma's pacemaker will go in on Tuesday . . . no, Wednesday . . . no, Tuesday. Okay, Tuesday afternoon officially.
June 21, 2:36 pm: . . . and we're baaaaaaaaaack! To Wednesday! We're perfectly willing to be bumped, however. Heart-transplant trumps still-kinda-working-heart. Emma was just relieved to be able to eat.
June 22, 9:31 am: Dr W's just been sent home to sleep. Emma had a bowl of Cheerios at 6:30 and is now on No Food or Water. She'll go in for her pacemaker this afternoon.
June 22, 9:42 am: The echo team is in, now. Still haven't had rounds come our way yet today. Gnomeo and Juliet is on . . . again!!! ;-) Aunt Reeb wonders (via comment field) if Emma has memorized it, yet, and Emma responds "Basically, almost the whole thing!"
June 22, 10:06 am: Rounds have been by, now; surgery will likely start between 12 and 2 this afternoon.
June 22, 2:12 pm: Bumped AGAIN! It's Transplant Week! Tufts has a kidney transplant inserting itself into the midst of the logjam created by yesterday's (okay, last night's!) heart transplant. The PA says Emma will definitely go tomorrow; they don't want her wait another day.
June 22, 4:26 pm: Dr W. is hoping to get her in as first case on Thursday. He spent half the afternoon skulking around, trying to snag an OR today to no avail.
June 22, 7:30 pm: We're officially on the schedule for 7:30 am Thursday! NPO (Again!) from midnight, tonight. Third time lucky?
June 23, 8:01 am: Dan called at 7:40 & Emma is in surgery!
June 23, 12:03 pm: Emma ROCKS!!! She was out & awake by 10:30. She's currently back in the PICU, resting and watching her dance recital DVD.
June 23, 2:02 pm: Emma has had some strawberries & some applesauce, & is currently FaceTiming w/ Penelope. Earlier, Dr. D was in & laughed at the fact that Emma was already sitting up & playing games on Webkinz.
June 23, 6:14 pm: According to Nurse K, Emma is amazing. Nurse K says she's going to tell all her cardiac patients now to "Be strong; be an Emma!"
June 24, 12:14 pm: When I got off the elevator this morning, Emma and Dan were in the hallway, waiting for me! The girl kicking butt and taking names? That's my daughter!!
June 24, 6:06 pm: Took a walk all the way down to the 1st floor gift shop with Emma & bought a few small things. Then we wandered over to Au Bon Pain & she ordered a tuna salad sandwich, chips, lemonade, & a chocolate chip cookie for dinner.
June 25, 11:48 am: Thank you, thank you, thank you, everyone who kept Emma and our whole family in their thoughts this past 10 days! Emma is home, the beagle has calmed down, and my twins are being normal, 8-year-old twins once again!
Yes, she has a medic-alert bracelet, now. The pacemaker is for life, and she's not allowed to do backbends or the Worm. Certain amusement-park rides are verboten, blows to the belly are cause for concern, and she will forever be the Pat-Down Princess in airports. I'm trying to help her find a response that she's comfortable using when strangers ask her about her scar (which is visible when she wears a v-neck shirt or a swimsuit). But she's been on her bike again since the beginning of August, and she's back in ballet/tap/jazz and Hip-Hop. She's thrown herself back into roller skating Fridays with gusto. We even had a Harry Potter Film Festival in July, because the girls wanted to see the movie in the theater with us! People who don't know what happened would never be able to guess.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Do you expect me to write?
Even though I hate large portions of the story I wrote last year (that story will remain forever hidden in the deepest of archives on my computer), I couldn't wait to sign up for another 30 days of NaNoWriMo insanity. Last year -- you remember! -- I signed up to do NaNo, then I broke my wrist. Yeah. That wasn't among the brightest of strategies, I'll admit. BUT! I didn't just manage to win NaNoWriMo, I met my goal with four days to spare!
This year, I have a new tool in my arsenal: Write or Die.
Write or Die (Putting the "Prod" in Productivity) is basically a motivational tool using negative reinforcement to keep you writing. The link above will take you to the main screen, and if you click the Web App button on the left, it jumps you to a small box where you can get started. I recommend fiddling around with it for five minutes to get a feel for the different grace periods and how effective you find the different levels of consequence. I'm not too fond of Kamikaze level consequences (which deletes your work one word at a time if you stop writing for too long), but I do prefer the Evil grace period (Don't even think about taking a sip of that tea! Write!). The idea is to get that inner editor silenced, after all.
I've even sucked Penelope and Emma into using it for their own NaNo stories. While Penelope has thrown herself into the NaNo experience with gusto, Emma has a particularly persistent internal editor. Couple that with her natural tendency towards perfectionism, and you have a recipe for disaster. (Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?) I set both girls up with the Normal consequence (they especially like hearing Banana Phone) and the Forgiving grace period, set them an attainable goal and time limit, and turn them loose.
While there are downloadable versions available for a reasonable fee, the Web App works just fine for me. (Ask me again, though, after I've been stuck for a while with my own internal editor and no internet connection.)
Give it a try, and Happy NaNoing!
This year, I have a new tool in my arsenal: Write or Die.
Write or Die (Putting the "Prod" in Productivity) is basically a motivational tool using negative reinforcement to keep you writing. The link above will take you to the main screen, and if you click the Web App button on the left, it jumps you to a small box where you can get started. I recommend fiddling around with it for five minutes to get a feel for the different grace periods and how effective you find the different levels of consequence. I'm not too fond of Kamikaze level consequences (which deletes your work one word at a time if you stop writing for too long), but I do prefer the Evil grace period (Don't even think about taking a sip of that tea! Write!). The idea is to get that inner editor silenced, after all.
I've even sucked Penelope and Emma into using it for their own NaNo stories. While Penelope has thrown herself into the NaNo experience with gusto, Emma has a particularly persistent internal editor. Couple that with her natural tendency towards perfectionism, and you have a recipe for disaster. (Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?) I set both girls up with the Normal consequence (they especially like hearing Banana Phone) and the Forgiving grace period, set them an attainable goal and time limit, and turn them loose.
While there are downloadable versions available for a reasonable fee, the Web App works just fine for me. (Ask me again, though, after I've been stuck for a while with my own internal editor and no internet connection.)
Give it a try, and Happy NaNoing!
Friday, June 3, 2011
be still my beating heart
People we see on a fairly regular basis, as well as most family members, already know that Emma has several congenital defects in her heart. To everyone else: Emma has several congenital defects in her heart. (Surprise!)
The worst of the defects, called Coarctation of the Aorta, was repaired when she was just 17 days old. Basically, it was a very narrow section of her aorta, and prevented adequate blood flow to her extremities. Since we were still brand-new parents wrestling with the reality of actually having two real crying, hungry, pooping, helpless babies, the whole thing was kind-of a blur. It wasn't until Emma was back in the PICU, puffed up on IV fluids and hooked up to every machine in the hospital (including the most expensive one and the one that goes "ping!") that we really felt scared.
Since infancy, Emma has had annual visits with a pediatric cardiologist to keep tabs on the next most serious defect, called Subaortic Stenosis. This defect is basically a membrane growing across the aortic valve, between the left ventricle and the valve itself. The membrane affects the bloodflow into her aorta; instead of flowing straight through the valve like it's supposed to, the blood swirls around and hits the valve itself. The effect of the blood hitting the valve day after day, heartbeat after heartbeat, eventually causes it to start leaking. In Emma's case, her aortic valve is also bicuspid instead of tricuspid. (For the record, Emma's fourth and final heart defect is a stenotic (narrow) mitral valve.)
This year, after reviewing her echocardiogram (ultrasound of her heart) Emma's cardiologist and surgeon agreed that the leak is starting to get worse. In the past year, it has gone from holding steady at "trivial" to deteriorating to "mild-to-moderate." In order to (we hope) slow or possibly halt the deterioration of her aortic valve, the doctors want to remove the membrane now, before the leak progresses to "severe."
Removing the membrane will require open-heart surgery. On my Emma.
This past Tuesday we met with her cardiologist again, had all her pre-op work done, and had a brief visit to the PICU at Tufts Floating Hospital for Children in Boston. Emma got to see a room similar to the one she'll be in, and was reassured to know that she'll have me either in-room with her or right down the hall (while she's still on a ventilator & sedated). She also got to meet her surgeon, Dr. Warner; he's the Chief of Cardiothoracic Surgery and the same surgeon who repaired her coarc eight years ago.
It's bizarre to consider the reproductive future of your eight-year-old daughter, but we want to keep Emma's factory-original parts in and working for as long as possible. If she ends up with a mechanical valve, it will complicate any future plans for pregnancy. Likewise, biologic valves come with their own risk of rejection. The longer Emma's own valve -- defective and misshapen though it may be -- can remain in her heart and working well, the more control Emma will have over her adult life.
Right now, we're trying to strike a balance between quarantining Emma completely (thus scaring the piss out of her) and maintaining the status-quo. Some of the things we would normally only be bugged about (like playing with a neighborhood kid whose nose is running like a soak-hose) are things we need to prohibit until after her surgery. We feel a little paranoid, but this is one of those times when paranoia is a good thing. According to the surgeon, once Emma is home, she can "resume normal activities" with the temporary exceptions of roughhousing and contact sports.
It's a good thing she's been considering taking a break from wrestling. See? It all works out!
The worst of the defects, called Coarctation of the Aorta, was repaired when she was just 17 days old. Basically, it was a very narrow section of her aorta, and prevented adequate blood flow to her extremities. Since we were still brand-new parents wrestling with the reality of actually having two real crying, hungry, pooping, helpless babies, the whole thing was kind-of a blur. It wasn't until Emma was back in the PICU, puffed up on IV fluids and hooked up to every machine in the hospital (including the most expensive one and the one that goes "ping!") that we really felt scared.
Since infancy, Emma has had annual visits with a pediatric cardiologist to keep tabs on the next most serious defect, called Subaortic Stenosis. This defect is basically a membrane growing across the aortic valve, between the left ventricle and the valve itself. The membrane affects the bloodflow into her aorta; instead of flowing straight through the valve like it's supposed to, the blood swirls around and hits the valve itself. The effect of the blood hitting the valve day after day, heartbeat after heartbeat, eventually causes it to start leaking. In Emma's case, her aortic valve is also bicuspid instead of tricuspid. (For the record, Emma's fourth and final heart defect is a stenotic (narrow) mitral valve.)
This year, after reviewing her echocardiogram (ultrasound of her heart) Emma's cardiologist and surgeon agreed that the leak is starting to get worse. In the past year, it has gone from holding steady at "trivial" to deteriorating to "mild-to-moderate." In order to (we hope) slow or possibly halt the deterioration of her aortic valve, the doctors want to remove the membrane now, before the leak progresses to "severe."
Removing the membrane will require open-heart surgery. On my Emma.
This past Tuesday we met with her cardiologist again, had all her pre-op work done, and had a brief visit to the PICU at Tufts Floating Hospital for Children in Boston. Emma got to see a room similar to the one she'll be in, and was reassured to know that she'll have me either in-room with her or right down the hall (while she's still on a ventilator & sedated). She also got to meet her surgeon, Dr. Warner; he's the Chief of Cardiothoracic Surgery and the same surgeon who repaired her coarc eight years ago.
It's bizarre to consider the reproductive future of your eight-year-old daughter, but we want to keep Emma's factory-original parts in and working for as long as possible. If she ends up with a mechanical valve, it will complicate any future plans for pregnancy. Likewise, biologic valves come with their own risk of rejection. The longer Emma's own valve -- defective and misshapen though it may be -- can remain in her heart and working well, the more control Emma will have over her adult life.
Right now, we're trying to strike a balance between quarantining Emma completely (thus scaring the piss out of her) and maintaining the status-quo. Some of the things we would normally only be bugged about (like playing with a neighborhood kid whose nose is running like a soak-hose) are things we need to prohibit until after her surgery. We feel a little paranoid, but this is one of those times when paranoia is a good thing. According to the surgeon, once Emma is home, she can "resume normal activities" with the temporary exceptions of roughhousing and contact sports.
It's a good thing she's been considering taking a break from wrestling. See? It all works out!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)